


Rooftop Thoughts

by sweetsmalldog



Series: Between the Action We Live [2]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Cyberpunk, Angst, Cyberpunk, F/M, a little fluff, as a treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:47:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24151552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetsmalldog/pseuds/sweetsmalldog
Summary: Scanlan's in a strange mood and decides to actually put some thought into his issues.
Relationships: Scanlan Shorthalt/Pike Trickfoot
Series: Between the Action We Live [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1742857
Kudos: 12





	Rooftop Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> You should read The Moments Between before you read this or some parts won't make sense.

No matter how many times Percy asked the answer remained the same, no he couldn’t remember what Raishan had said. It had been corrupted when _she tore him apart_. And quite honestly he was still mad at Percy for that, he trusted Raishan to not have an ulterior motive. On top of that instead of using the protocol that had been set up in a scenario like Scanlan just got ripped apart by a conniving scalie which was simply use the copy of his AI with all his memories up until twenty four hours ago and it's fine slightly jarring but fine but no Percy decided to try and salvage what was left of that days memories. Scanlan understood why he did it, the Briarwoods were a threat and needed to be taken care of but that wouldn't make him forgive Percy for leaving him with the memories of agony as he was ripped apart.

His decision to ignore everyone's messages was coming back to bite him as Grog and Vex spammed him, lighting his eyes up violet until he muted them. As he stared down at the city glowing especially bright in the middle of the night. Lights from billboards lit everything more than street lamps could. Everything down there was blue and pink and purple and green, everything was changing and flashing. He dangled his feet off the edge of De Rolo Town, music playing in his brain without the need for earbuds. It was strangely relaxing just staring out at the world below him in the dark, made all the more surreal by the fact he couldn’t hear the sounds of this sleepless city just the beat of music.

He let out a sigh, it felt like the appropriate thing to do when sitting on the edge of a building watching the bustling of the city below you while ruminating on one’s trauma despite how stereotypical it felt. He wasn’t usually one to dwell on the past or the mistakes his friends sometimes made that caused unintentional hurt but part of him yearned to think on this, yearned to let himself be angry with Percy instead of just burying everything deep inside of himself. Just to let himself be bitter and angry even just for a moment, let himself feel something negative.

Vex had called him repressed; he'd laughed her off but he’d known she was right even then. It was a hard pill to swallow. That despite not even strictly being alive he was a jumbled mess of emotional issues but with wires instead of veins.

He broke his gaze with the streets below to look up. He was met with falling water and a dark featureless sky. The sky had always been that way to him, empty of any defining features other than the sun, the moon, and the occasional clouds. Pike talked about stars and he’d seen pictures of them but part of him still doubted their existence, beautiful silver dots of light cutting through the void of the night sky instead of the ground glowing in man made multicolored neon lights meant to entice you. The rest of the world sounded so untouched in comparison, full of greenery instead of hard grey concrete. He knew he was a part of this world, the grit, the grime, the development, the lack of sleep even but that world was something so vaguely fascinating but he also never wanted to interact with it in fear of how he could hurt it. It was so strong yet balanced on a thread.

He swung his feet back onto the roof and stood up before taking one last long look at the city with its flashing colors. Before he made his way down the long winding metal stairs. Past a long abandoned office full of books of almost every genre and a desk made from purple wood. Down another staircase because it felt better to move then take the elevator in that moment, less like existing and more like living. Eventually making his way to an abandoned hallway with a heavy metal door that led to an enclosed balcony.

He hoped Keyleth wasn’t there despite it being her weird greenhouse biodome thing, he’d never really cared what it actually was. All he knew was that it was the closest thing to nature he’d ever seen. He was aware on some level that some of the plants were worth hundreds of dollars but it was all vague and non-consequential to him. They were beautiful and alive and why should anything else matter? There were trees with ripening fruit and flowers blooming in planter boxes. It was beautiful. He found a bench surrounded by bushes covered in orange flowers and sat down.

It felt different than sitting on the roof, maybe it felt more alive he honestly couldn’t say. He could see the bee box and butterflies were resting nearby. Life surrounded him but he still felt no more connection to it here than he did on the roof. He stared at the flowers and trees and leaves and vines with an empty look. His strange contemplative mood had left him completely exhausted. He stayed in the greenhouse for who knows how long blankly staring at the world around him until someone eventually found him.

Pike didn’t comment on the fact he was drenched or that he’d been staring at nothing. She didn’t need to. She just sat next to him and took his hand. Ran one hand down his cheek to wipe away the condensation. They sat together until he was ready to get up. He vaguely realized the sun was rising as they slowly walked to their room. No one saw them or at least he didn’t see them. When they got back she handed him a towel. He got out of his soaking clothing and threw them in a hamper before slowly wiping the water off his body before changing into a clean lavender shirt and a warm pair of pajama pants before sitting cross legged in the center of the bed like an asshole. He stared out the wall of windows where the man made light never ceased outside.

He flipped open the panel on his inner left forearm. The ports stared back at him. He traced one with his finger. It was cold. He reluctantly moved over to his side of the bed. He sighed as he shoved the plug into his arm. A signal flashed in his eye _**connection stable, saving memories**_. He laid his head on a pillow, _**two hours until download complete**_ flashing no matter what he did, he was doomed to spend the next two hours staring at a progress bar.

Pike came back, her hair wet from a shower. She closed the curtain and blocked the light of the world from their view. She laced her hand with his as she read a report on her datapad. Her touch was grounding. He went threw his messages and sent apologies out to Grog and Vex. He knew they were asleep this early and that their datapad wouldn’t wake them up. On some level sending it out before they could see him typing was probably for defense, he didn’t have the strength for a conversation right now. He didn’t want them to worry more when they woke up though, they deserved better than that.

He glanced over at Pike, her hair slowly drying in the warm air of their bedroom. He squeezed her hand. She squeezed his back. The morning rolled by and he slowly regained his lost energy, Pike’s hand in his. Rain still fell and the muffled sounds of the city could be heard but it wasn’t nearly as loud as it had been before the music.

He’d go back to living later. Later he’d apologize to Grog and Vex in person. He’d sit in Keyleth’s garden again. She’d see him but say nothing. He appreciated that more than she’d know. He’d joke with Grog and Vax as they got tipsy. He’d tease Vex about Trinket while they ate and just enjoy his family. He and Percy would meet each other’s eyes and silently agree to talk later once this was all said and done. It was slow but he was moving forward.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sweetsmalldog on Tumblr if you wanna check me out.


End file.
